Communication Is Key!

When being involved whether it's a relationship or casual sex, it's important to communicate. But you have to understand tht there's different levels of communication. You have verbal communication, sexual communication and an unspoken communication which I like to categorize as touching.

I don't know how many of you realize it but touching someone holds so much meaning. You can actually get to know someone by touching them! No words need to be exchanged...just touch them and see how they react. Granted, each person is different but the sense of touch is the same across the board. The energy that your body gives off will be transferred to the next person. We have the ability to touch someone & take away all their negative energy with a simple touch.

I knw everyone is busy, but we have to make the time to use the most underused sense that was given to us. Here are some ways to go about it.

1. Warm It Up: Make sure the area in which you plan to have an intimate touching session is warm & comfortable. You can light incense, oils or candles.

2. Silence is Golden: Unplug the phones or put them on silent. Turn off the tv and turn on some mellow music.

3. No Happy Ending: This is NOT a massage, so touching the genitals is OFF LIMITS. (lol)

4. Shhh...: Do NOT use words at all (unless it's to say something makes you uncomfortable).

5. Expect the Unexpected: This touching session is NOT an avenue to sex. ;)

6. One Hand Washes The Other: You and your mate should have 30mins to explore each other. 15mins on the back & 15mins on the front and use all 30mins to go from head to toe.

7. Don't Be Skeerd: Use different methods of touching like long & short strokes, soft and hard caresses and don't be afraid to use your palms, fingertips & the back of your hands as all different places offer different sensations.

8. Give It Time: After you & your partner explored one another, don't talk about it. Let it soak in..let your body relish in the moment.

9. Where Are You: Using a blind fold will definitely heighten the sense of touch for the receiver. They won't be able to see you or know which way you're going to touch them ;)

10. Time Is Of the Essence: Remember to take your time. Don't rush.

I believe that Barack & Michelle showed the world that affection in the form of touching isn't a bad thing. Their public display of affection without using words made even the hardest and emotionless ppl respect their genuine love. ;)

Question:

Do you find time to communicate through touching? If so, how do you go about it?

Change Is Good!

Being that we have started yet another new year, a lot of ppl feel the need to make changes in their life. And it's nothing wrong with feeling that way, b/c change is GOOD :)

But change can also be a bad thing. The bad change I'm talking about is when you've been in a relationship for so long that both people change and forget to keep the spark lit in their relationship. They forget to go out on dates, on vacation, or just out for a drink after work. They even dress differently like wearing frumpy clothes to bed or wearing bleached sweats to the supermarket. Sometimes, ppl cut back on sex and this type of change isn't a good look..lol.

In order to keep the spark in a relationship, try different things from time to time. Here are some ideas that can keep it exciting :)

1. Lap of Luxury: Rent a room for 1 night at a luxury hotel in your area. Order champagne, eat strawberries, and take a nice warm bubble bath together. You can even get a couples massage!

2. Raising the Bar: Pick a nice after work bar and met each other there. Order drinks, finger food and get your two step on!...and laugh it up.

3. Pack it Up: Get a bottle of wine, pack a few snacks and blanket and go to a nice park and have a romantic picnic. Lay around on each other, feed each other & enjoy the quality time.

4. Get Outta Here: Pack a wkend bag filled with sexy lingerie (silk boxers for him) and get the heck out of town. It doesn't have to be far. There are great deals out there, whether it's a spa, a retreat or an entertainment destination like Disney, or gambling.

5. Surprise, Surprise: Invite your mate over for a nice dinner. You can ask them to come over and when they arrive, have the table set, some candles lit and mellow music playing in the back ground. And don't hold back. Have some appetizers, the main course and dessert (whether it's you or something they can eat off of you ;)

Question:
What do you do to keep your relationship exciting?

I Need My Space

This past wkend, I decided to meet up w/ some of my girls and hit up a lounge in the Brooklyn area. When my homegirls & I got to the spot, a few of the ladies were already waiting in a balcony area so we took off our coats, said our hello's and started doing our two-step.

Out of nowhere, this guy comes up to me & asked for a dance. I told him to give me a minute b/c I was unwinding and wanted to order a drink first. He said okay and placed himself against a nearby wall. At that point one of my girls got hype off of a song the DJ played and she grabbed me to dance w/ her and I did.... AS SOON as I moved to dance dude who had asked me 2 dance came to me and started dancing w/me. I gave my homegirl the "uggghhh" look and she laughed and said in my ear "go head and bust a move so he can leave u the hell alone"...I laughed & said ok....I gave him a 2 min dance and went back to my friends.

Don't u knw this dude was ON my tail the WHOLE night! Every time I went to move, he tried to grab me and dance. I told him in a nice 'you need to get the hint' kinda way that I was hot and I wanted to sit for a while. You would think he got the hint NOPE!....he wanted to talk to me about sh*t ur not supposed 2 talk about in an overly crowded lounge! Like 'what do u do for a living', or 'what do you like to do for fun'...I looked at him like 'dude, I'm hanging out w/ my girls for fun u dumb ass'...but you're ruining my freaking fun! Even one of my girls said "DAYUM, he's annoying, I'm annoyed for you!!".... (she helped cock block to get him to move) ;)

When the bug-a-boo came back around to try to dance w/ me again, I was beyond annoyed and told him tht I didn't want to be bothered b/c I had a long day and I even hit him w/ the "I have kids" line but that didn't deter him especially when I said I had a 14yr old and a 13yr old at home waiting for me!..(granted I was talkin about my siblings) but I thought it would send him running for the exit. Nope, he proceeded to show me a pic of his daughter! My night was getting worse by the minute!

My girl suggested tht we go to another lounge & I was more than happy to bounce but b4 I left of course this bug-a-boo was on my heels asking if we could exchange digits, I said nope and said I had no room in my life for a 'friend' b/c I had kids to raise & my home girls couldn't contain her hysteria!..lol. and we bounced.

Fellas, for those who are bug-a-boo's, pls don't follow one female around ALL night!!! It's pathetic and annoying! I didn't come there w/you so don't try to make me your club/lounge wifey! Stop posting up waiting 4 tht one female to move b4 u peel yourself off the wall to grind on her!

Ladies, share your bug-a-boo stories b/c know ya'll have some!!...lol

The Goat-Happy Birthday Capricorns

It's that time again for me to send a special/sexual birthday shout out to all the Capricorns out there!  Here is a little bday gift. Enjoy the below snippet by T. Balfour

"Capricorns are self-absorbed and are more interested in the sexual act than in the sexual partner. They want to dominate in bed b/c control is important to them. Outwardly, they seem quite cold, but tht's only a defense mechanism; once aroused, they are rough and sadistic--eager to use paddles, whips or vibrators for their sexual pleasure."

"The Capricorn woman doesn't like to be surprised in bed; she wants to knw wht to expect. And don't worry about a lot of preliminaries, b/c getting her aroused requires just a few nibbles of the ears and navel. She's a traditionalist  who prefers the missionary positions, she can be turned on by cunnilingus, but doesn't want to perform fellatio. She's a screamer, scratcher, biter and spanker, she has a strong sex drive and likes prolonged lovemaking. As her partner, you're in for a very long night!"

"The Capricorn man pride himself on his stamina and his ability to satisfy a women. Don't make the mistake of trying to lead the goat b/c he wont tolerate it. Instead, let him take the lead. This man is easily aroused when everything is in place: slow, seductive music, soft lights turned low and an exotic setting. He can be sadistic, though, sometimes resorting to simulated rape, and he prefers to climax by anal penetration."

Most compatible with Virgo, Taurus, Pisces, or Scorpio.

Wow...I'm in the list of most compatible w/ ;) I'm kinda feeling the stimulated rape thing lol. But tht's another post lol.

Challenge: Can you tell me wht you REALLY see in the pic. Take a close look! Lets see who's on point! ;)

The Unexpected...

We all hear about how females have a hard time reaching an orgasm so sometimes, we may fake it in order to make our partner feel up to par. Most guys know and understand that different females have a hard time climaxing depending on her body (and just b/c we don't climax doesn't mean the sexual act isn't enjoyable). Our 'faked' orgasms are deemed okay because we don't have the same 'luxury' as guys when it comes to climaxing.

We're so used to a guy climaxing without any problems. It's always an expected thing even if his experience with a female is a good session or straight up whack, he'll still find a way to bust tht nutt. But what happens when a guy fakes his orgasm? 

Of course a guy isn't going to tell us tht he faked it, but wht happens when u look down and the condom is empty or maybe you don't notice right away and u find the condom later on and there's not a drop of semen in it? As a female, it makes you feel like you haven't done your 'job' in pleasing your man. And tht's when the questions start to go through you mind like....am I tht whack?, is he not attracted to me?, did I do something wrong? etc.  But 9 times out of 10 if something like tht does happen, it's probably not due to any fault of the female. 

I'm not saying that females can't do any wrong in the bedroom, but for a man to climax, it's all a mental thing. Most men can control whether they climax or not but when they "can't" then it might be other things going on in the other head (attached to their neck & shoulders)...lol.

Question:

Fellas, have you ever faked an orgasm? If so, why & did the female find out about it

Ladies, how would you feel if you found out your boo faked it?